Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
Randomize
