We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
