mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
