It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
