Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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