Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize