whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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