"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Randomize
