I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
I feel like I should come with a warning like "Orgasm free since 1983"
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
