Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
