Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
