He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
Randomize
