Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize