Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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