playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
Randomize
