All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize