p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
Randomize