Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
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