i think my tv is drunk
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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