The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Your cock deserves a montage
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
