ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
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