also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
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