Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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