If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
