Screwed.edu
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
