fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
