Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Randomize
