I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
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