You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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