Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize
