belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
low key just jizzed in a chinese food container
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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