Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
