Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
