we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Just waxed 95% of the hair off my vag. If he doesn't enjoy this tonight, you will, whether you like it or not.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize