When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
i just google imaged poop.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Randomize
