Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Randomize
