Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
It says something about our relationship that he stole your phone to tell me about his dick at 3am and neither of us realized that wasn't you until just now
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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