Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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