is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
