porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
