I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize