i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Swine flu is the new snow day.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
