Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
