I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
