bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Randomize
