last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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