tell your sister to shave her snatch
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Randomize
