She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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