he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Randomize
