Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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